Toffee/Candy as a Currency

Last week, I was paying 75 bucks for my beer against payment of Rs. 100 bill and the vendor returns two Rs. 10 bills and a packet of bhujiya (snack), manufactured in the backyards of Chandni Chowk, Sadar Bazar or some other shady industrial/trading area of New Delhi. That was too much for me, one rupee coin has long been replaced by toffees/candies/chewing gums, everybody has understood the concept and nowadays at times, even I trade toffees/candies. In case some shopkeeper offers me toffee/candies for a rupee or two, I try to give it back to him or other shopkeeper (in case he is offering toffees/candies as a currency replacement). The only argument from my end is always, if you are offering toffees instead of coins, then you can accept it also.

But five bucks took me by a jolt, not in the sense that five bucks is very crucial to my existence but then I believe, first I don’t want that packet of bhujiya and second as a legal contract he is bound to pay me five bucks. Third shopkeepers are cornering tidy profits by offering their wares as currency.

One of my friends, who runs wholesale drugs (medicine) shop, has a big box candies in his drawer. He puts his hands more in the candy box then in his cash box during the day. Not that he is fond of toffees/candies. He clarifies, “One to four rupee leftovers are made in terms of toffees/candies. It’s difficult to obtain coins from the banks and to manage coins is another hassle.”

It sums up the state of the Economy of the world’s largest secular democratic nation in the world. The central bank is not able to print/float/manage enough currency in the market. Whatever the reasons are?

On the contrary, it’s not about the efficiency/inefficiency of central bank. A large part of the coins printed/floated in the Indian economy are offered as service to Gods, beggars control a significant amount of coins. Even beggars don’t appreciate who offer coins, they want rupees. But then they are not saving/spending completely in coins, a lot can be said and heard about the same, perhaps we need some study to figure out the dilemma, functions, operations and issues around the same.

India is a developing nation, perhaps second nation with a consistent growth level achieved globally. There are new classes emerging in India, from low, middle to upper to very poor, poor, middle, middle burgeoning, middle splurging, rich, urban rich, rural rich, newly rich, techie rich, idea rich, filthy rich, freaking rich, globally rich. Compared to America, we are still an anna size economy, but still it knows, understands and respects the value of 1 cent, the smallest denomination of their currency (Dollar). And India, a land of feudals and tribals has discarded the value of One Rupee. So much so, it is totally into extinction and the value of the same is lost.

In the same vain, Rupee Five Currency Notes is not in print and RBI plans to replace Ten Rupee Currency Notes with coins. The heavy steel coin encased in a copper shell, what is the point of floating such heavy currency in the market. It’s difficult and cumbersome to carry and trade with such heavy coins. In developed nations, we find such a wide range of coins and currency and never once would find 1 cent, 1 Yen will lose its value, the way it has been discarded in India. A day will come when toffees/candies will become currency or is it already so? Keep thinking what will toffee/candy manufacturers might become?

Toffee and candies have taken the position of One Rupee and One Rupee is lost in the glitter of our so called and ultra famed burgeoning booming economy of India.

Live enjoyment in Peepli

The LIVE word can be construed as live as in live matches or live as we live our lifes.

Peepli Live, most of my friends comprehended, it will be a bore. So what if Aamir Khan is promoting it, it need not be a good movie? And why not Aamir Khan should promote it? He is the producer. When you watch the movie, you realize, you required Aamir Khan to promote this movie? There are interactions, press conferences, you need a face to represent the movie. The posters do reveal a lot about the movie, a poor rural family, few mikes hanging from the top, media swarming from the top, LIVE word in frame and a handpump. So what if the whole caste and the issue is pasted on it? You have little or no idea, how its going to play? One of the rare posters, which captures and narrates the real characters of the movie and summons it at appropriate places.

Take a dig at the other poster pictured below. It a tempu, the mass transporter of rural India. In my native place, it is known as bhoond (Punjabi word for honey bee). It is distastingly painted black with some part of it yellow, may be the front hood or the top part. But the sight of tempu is the same in any part of our truly majestic India, people are hanging from all sides and their daily wares.

Peepli Live is one of the rare movies of Bollywood, which was running without (count it), a named and famed director, no famed actor, no famed actress, no dream sequences, no dances, no item number, no burning issue, no action, no romance, no melodrama, no crying, barely music (definitely can be defined as antonym of musical). What the movie contains? Just the way India was and currently it is progressing. A very nice written and delivered script revolving around a very small incident but a very big issue for India. We should learn to laugh at ourselves that is what director has tried to aim. If you feel ashamed, do something about it? Until then keep laughing at your plight.

Peepli Live is a satire on farmer’s suicide. But I believe, honestly, it is a satire on media and our political system or perhaps the way our country is being run. The moot point the director raises, a farmer may not till his/her land, may not require money/food. All they want is the respect for their lands. We are not able to provide them with a single way of existence, aim, mission, vision and dream of our life.

Media star characters are brilliantly brought to the front. Perhaps a spoof or original cut-outs of Barkha Dutt of NDTV and Chaurasia of AajTak (don’t know if this fellow has switched employers, well must have, we all do). Media is the most creative industry in India. They can make and create a movie and an issue with nobody. This is what they have depicted in the movie. They are trying to address an issue of farmer suicide. Yet it is the last thing, on their mind.

Every character plays to his part with such elegance and poise. The media personnel as they are hogging like dogs and spewing like donkeys. Natha, the real face of the movie, has barely one or two dialogues. But his expressions make his character. I have no idea what is happening in my life, why is it happening and what I am supposed to do about it? Just listens and barely responds. Raghubir Yadav, one of the finest actors in India. The wife, as women are (oh sorry as rural woman are), always screaming and abusing their husbands and in laws.

Politicians and IAS officers, as they are in real life, we are only here to show and project that we are trying to do things. The only beneficiary in the name of WE the people is me, me and me. The handpump in the picture below is granted under the Lal Bahadur Shastri scheme by the District Collector. Natha does ask for the fitting expenses but that is not part of the scheme. Nobody talks about his loan or his land in possession of the bank.

Finally the amma, whose only working limb is her tongue and she uses it to perfection to abuse at every opportunity and appropriate time anybody who comes in front of her. Especially her bahu (daughter in law) with kulta, naaspiti, karamjali, abhouri, naagin, daayein and yes there are few prefixing family relations too.

The ending does not possess a happy ending like a typical Bollywood masala, boy hugging the girl’s parents. Such movies never have a happy ending, instead it creates another level of disruption with no conclusion.

Conclusion or no conclusion, do watch it in theatre and definitely finds a place in the selected DVDs section.

Tere Bin Laden - Watch it or Laugh it

The name of the movie suggests, it’s a satire. It’s a satire on Osama Bin Laden, THE MAN on this earth with $25 million for its headless body and couple of billions or trillions already in the drain for his head. I really admire him for the way; he has made Americans to stalk the Afghanistan. Normally the world wants to stalk or hound Americans till the time they abuse you in public.

For the movie, Mr. Laden raises cocks and hens. He runs a mini poultry farm of his own. He loves and adores his cocks and hens. The irony and parody running in the movie is remarkable and phenomenal. A young Pakistani reporter working with some stupid Danka TV wants to go to America, the land of his dreams. The movie comes at a time when in reality, the Americans have made Pakistan a bigger mess than Afghanistan, that too for supporting America and not fighting them. Though for the reporter, Mr. Ali Zafar should remain stuck to his singing and not acting. He barely knows and seems to show little potential to become an actor.

The irony and parody in the movie, a Pakistani reporter wants to visit America riding on his success of an interview with a fake Osama Bin Laden. What on Earth went in the maker’s mind? Everybody is laughing their way including the producers. I never expected the movie to be a laugh riot. You are laughing and laughing, till it hurts with all the quirky one liners from Noora aka Osama Bin Laden. The best one is “tere behan nu lassi pilawa”. Or Sikander, my star murga, who won the competition; “he, alone has taken control/incharge of 1000 hens”.

The whole effort goes in building the characters, Osama Bin Laden aka Noora, cameraman, owner of the channel, make-up artist, Ted ji, Pakistani brigadiers. Definitely a must watch for all the Asians. In introspection of what we are and what we aim to become and definitely the means we attach to it.

Tweet or Text

One of my friends commented on facebook, “this is most shared video amongst my friends”. I congratulated her on this feat and suggested to put it on resume. Before I begin, personally I don’t have anything against the social networking world/arena/sphere/geography. Really don’t know how anybody wants to define it. It is a great way to connect. I have found schoolmates, friends, love, lost love, found love, have done and used it for all the practical and not so practical things (actually more for it).

Aamir Khan is not normally found in news too much. Except around the release of his movie, he virtually pastes his name, his movie’s name on every wall, street, road, lips of India. But for the past some time, he has been in news for joining twitter. The news reads, Aamir Khan decides to join twitter.

The media frenzy has little or no job, hence they try to make a BREAKING NEWS of any monkey climbing the wall or even falling from it. Aamir Khan’s twitter joining/commencement/launch date was even more anticipated than any of his movies. People lose jobs/stature due to twitter. Big B was the most busy actor till recent and now he is persuading his community (Bollywood) people to join Twitter. As long as Big B is concerned, he never uses a product is he is not endorsing it. He is endorsing all the things that are required in daily life.

Media stays on job for following Twitter of celebrities. The name, profile pic, mahurat of first tweet, every silly aspect, which Aamir otherwise may not have thought for movies even. “Twitter ka baadshah kaun”, we will hear this news and analysis, few months down the line.

Aamir Khan got 37,500 followers on his first day of tweeting.

This morning he joined Twitter officially and said in his first message: "Bhala gardish falak ki chain deti hai kise Insha, ganimat hai ke hum surat yahan do-chaar baithey hain. Esp for you sir. Love. Thanks for the warm welcome guys. Love. Aamir."

Amitabh welcomed him saying, "Thank you Aamir... You give more due than I deserve ... Happy Tweeting ...."

In this narrow world, where SMSes have replaced letters. Tweets are replacing the real touch of a human being.

Raavan – Why and How of it?

I know it’s too late to actually discuss about the movie, “Raavan”, especially these days when the highly anticipated are doomed in three days (maybe first date or during pre-release even) and the much celebrated last 10 days. But still its better to let out the autopsy report after all the dust has settled.

As the saying goes, an exceptional filmmaker is granted pardon for one exceptional blunder of his career. But its still hard to digest, when you name, Mani Ratnam.

Honestly I was not so bored as everybody was while watching Raavan. Not because I have spent money and we should try to enjoy the movie. Every movie has something or the other to offer. In case of Raavan, it was Santosh Sivan’s work. The way he has shot the visuals of the movie even if Abhishiek sliding down the mountain goes out of the frame is worth it. Just enjoy, we only dream about such visuals and places. When you visit, it’s never so enchanting or out of the world, so definitely a high point of the movie.

So the big question is, Why was Raavan made at the first instance? Everybody said before the release, it’s the career defining film for the first couple of Bollywood. It’s definitely career defining movie, I hope they make more sensible choices in future.

Yesterday watching a repeat telecast of IIFA awards and Amitabh was receiving award for Best Actor for his role in PAA. How many great actors in Bollywood have won a Best Actor award without a trophy like actress in their arms in movie? Leave aside SRK, Aamir, none. Actually barring the two, hardly others get a chance. Amitabh Bachchan out of his magnanimity in 1991 or 1992 gave his Best Actor award to the other nominees in Best Actor category and told the baton should be handed over to the next generation. Not that he is less magnanimous or his craving for awards has increased. Its perhaps the first family of Bollywood should only get such awards, since the next generation is not taking the responsibility (the son), hence the elderly has to take the charge (the father). In Bollywood, its not your work or the character you have played, but rather you and your out of the movies personality should exhibit that yes I do deserve an award. The big award winners are always in media circles for most of the things which are not related to movies.

I can bet on it, the best villain award for 2010 goes to Abhishiek Bachchan husband of Aishwarya Rai Bachchan (former Miss World) and yes he is still son of Amitabh Bachchan, the lead actor of Bollywood.

Couple of years back, Abhishiek said, paa got an award, maa got an award, I was nominated; I would have been good had I got an award even. I truly and with whole heart sympathize with you Abhishiek. When you are brought up in the setup where only receiving awards and adding honours is the need and purpose of your existence. It definitely feels bad. Even I am undergoing similar type of circumstances, my brother and sister always agree with my father and I am the one, who is always arguing and add to the fact, they always scored good in academics and I was always floundering.

Everybody in the Bachcan family has been awarded Padma Shri, except Abhishiek Bachchan. Going by the profile of the family, isn’t it justified and time for the junior AB to be awarded few or most of the stupid Bollywood awards and followed by the big Padma Shri award in 2011 or maximum by 2012.

Some people have already started crying for what?
For his stupid, uniconic and very useless and superficial act of Beera. The most boring and disturbing element of Beera was his trademark bur-bur-bur-bur or bak-bak-bak while shaking his head, which is like a necessity to be provided to any villain in a Bollywood movie. Gone are the days, when Mogambo would say, “mogambo khush hua”, everybody would get sad on hearing about his khushi. Children living in villages, towns and cities actually feared the Gabbar of Sholay. That was where Mr. Mani failed, casting the Bachchan scion as the villain, a villain never deserves a sympathy. Even if he deserves, it is for his situations and not for his way and means. Beera got it all. Ram and Sita were like unfit blocks disturbing the Raavan. Even the actress was convinced with the villain. The hero, the quintessential good man of Bollywood movies was lost looking for his place in the script. Perhaps that’s the reason it was named RAAVAN and not Ramayana. For the audience, the real RAAVAN still is Mr. Mani Ratnam.

IT’S OFFICIAL NOW: Shopping makes men impotent

Shopping is really bad for men's health and fertility, scientists are now saying after new research.

I definitely knew about the health part but I still doubt the fertility point. Men get weak, bored to death while women love to shop. Women enjoy shopping, while the man goes through the process of heart-aches and numbness. For women it is stress reliever, while for men it is biggest source of stress.

The way women spend, definitely affects the man’s health. Losing his hard-earned money, when men know they have little option, then can only save to undergo heart surgery. A man cannot defend his own territory against a woman.

The study says, “In the long term, this leads to less sexual drive, encourages the belly instead of the muscles to grow and has a bad effect on erection and potency”.

I doubt the fact actually losing the battle perhaps bring with it few brownie points, for which men are ready to undergo suffering. If it leads to the point mentioned in the study, then perhaps the world will become a sad and bad place to live. Most of the women will turn violent and abusive and forget about themselves as woman. Think about it, men stop going to shopping with women. They’ll believe most of the problems have been capped. But still the problem aggravates, because it will make them less manly.

Contrary to all the theories, practices, if a man takes his woman for shopping, then his heart ache, it means trouble, if he doesn’t, he feels less manly, may risk the chances of losing self-confidence and thus perhaps maybe, fertility.

But still this topic is open for debate and suggestions. Women are not going to change or improve and men never even try to be the change they want to see.

Mukesh on Broadband via Wireless

3G and BWA auctions are over. After all the important, not so important commented on the lack of Indian Govt. to license and allow to launch 3G at par on time with the developed nations. Here comes the time, when 3G (Third Generation Wireless Services) or BWA (Broadband Wireless Access) is/will be reality in India in few month’s time. 3G or BWA has the speed that you can make babies on net. You can watch your favourite TV show, movie even on mobile.

PM (Pranab Mukherjee, though it hints more at Manmohan Singh) is laughing his way to the bank. Govt.’s (all over the World) make money by giving us the license to live (Income Tax), grow (Wealth Tax) and do business (too many to list). But derisking the whole nation by licensing to source/monetize waves is the masterstroke. Rupees One Lakh Six Thousand Crore Only, it was difficult to count the zeros. Telecom Ministry has become the Jewel in the Crown, especially after Mr. Raja became a big embarrassment for the UPA Govt. in their previous term due to telecom licenses. His name could make the new Govt. fall. He definitely needs to be given a bonus for the monies that the Govt. has earned. The money could easily help the Govt. to reduce the Fiscal Deficit by 100 basis points, after reaching the alarming levels in 2009-10. I fear it may not amount to mere electronic entries for the Govt. of India, wherein, telcos. approach the PSU banks to help them in financing their license fee, as happened in previous PSU market issues (listing on stock market). SBI and LIC filled up the issue numbers of NMDC and NTPC as market (investors) expected little from the Govt.

Let us take a peekaboo at the build up and the outcome of the auctions.

Before the build up, let’s look at the outcome. Mukesh Ambani is back in telecom space. That’s the bigger news in the industry than the money to be parked with Govt. coffers. Mukesh Ambani is famous/known for disrupting the markets with his ambitious and audacious plans. Market players are forced to change their strategies, thinking to stay in business.

People are guffawing for the fact that why BWA has managed to collect double the revenues for the Govt. than 3G. In 3G, only Reliance, Bharti, Vodafone, Tata and Aircel participated. There are whole bunch of players in Internet business. RCOM, Tata and Idea have already backed out of the bids, referring it as too steep prices for broadband business.

Mukesh Ambani has done the trick, bid and bagged all the 22 circles in BWA auction. Mukesh Ambani builds assets at the price at which it is difficult to think even. 22 circles at Rs. 128.48 billion when most others have coughed upto Rs. 6,000 Crore for 5,6 or 8 odd circles. Mukesh Ambani’s in his trademark style has taken the assets at the heavy discount as compared to other players in the industry.

Further to be anticipated, how he moves front and back in the telecom and digital telephony space with BWA license. Listen and just try to interpret, “A single 20 MHz TDD spectrum when used with LTE (Long Term Evolution) has the potential of providing greater capacity when compared to existing communication infrastructure in the country”. Another strange thing, when perhaps it was said, that some of the bigger groups were ready to offer their license to RIL at throwaway prices. Infotel Broadband Services (P) Ltd., I doubt if they anything relating to broadband besides the word in the Company Name. Mr. Nahata is still to pay Rs. 500 odd crores to the bank. Still recording losses at breakneck speed, I really adore their commitment to the Company.

Biggest uproar is the fact, Mukesh Ambani is back into his dream industry days after scraping the non-compete agreement with his litloo (younger brother). Reliance Infocomm set up by Mukesh Ambani now known as Reliance Communications is now in the hands of Anil Ambani in family division. Did that Non-Compete Agreement possess any importance?, when they had fought tooth and nail for the dead gas floating in sea bed of Krishna Godavari basin.

As for the customers, they are going to rake the moolah with the pricing strategy and product development of Mukesh Ambani.
Last time it was Roti, kapda aur mobile.
This time it will be less than that even but still sufficient.